Tuesday, October 31, 2006written once at 8:32 PM

I'm so tempted to start a tag thingie XD And I seem to have alot to talk about lately but for now, I just can't seem to remember about ANYTHING at all. I think one of the only few things on my mind right now is about young boys falling in love. I know a few guys who are kinda suffering because of what the girl had done to them after either confessing or somehow the news spreaded. Notice how I use the term 'boys'? It's because these few boys are all younger than me. Hwahwah. You know, when they tell me their problems, it made me feel like telling them that they are still so young, what for stay down and be sad all day long when there's so much in life that's offered to you? Do the things you like, so what if there's sadness somewhere on the way? Move on! *sings Simonie's LGZ's song 'Move On'* Of course, everything is easier said than done. But if you never try you'll never know.

Sometimes it really occurs to me that you have to pass that certain stage of life to understand what's the whole idea all about. I remembered just last year where I really really like, really liked this guy. I think that case was one of the rare cases that ever happened in my life. I never liked a guy THAT much ever. But seriously, after it's all done and over with, I find it really amusing. Not that it's stupid or something, but the things I had done for him; all those sacrifices, stuff that you probably thought it's only available in movies/dramas or soap operas happened. It certainly taught me something somehow. In a way, I've learned something? ;]

I think I'll probably be updating more often because up till now I have no idea how continue my latest fic [which is yet to be posted until I finished]. Exams are coming... *big sigh* 20 days to THE DAY. I wonder how and what will I do after that... All the protection and what not all stripped away. Hohoho. Probably I'm exaggerating because I have yet to enter the new world after F5.

Another note, I missed Hyukkie <33 I know I shouldn't be because I'm feeding myself Suju goodies daily. I even download the AUDIOs of Sukira. I loveee how Hyukkie plays the piano! I shall add into my criteria that my future boyfriend must be able to sing/dance x] Or at least is able to play a single instrument. Heh heh. Okay, so even if he doesn't sings and can't sing, if he tries, I'm happy ;]

Boring isn't it. ._.

Next time you guys tell me what to write. HAHA! Oh one last thing before I end, anybody wanna do a collab with me? Yes yes, I know, exams are just around the corner but I really wanna do a collab! The voice lately seems pretty good so yeah...

Till then, <3
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Saturday, October 21, 2006written once at 11:58 PM

[psst. Note; whoever who reads this [& doesn't knows me, this is for my personal use. This is a personal blog. Please do NOT take it out ANYWHERE. NOT allowed. AT ALL. Thank you for your cooperation.]

Okay, so the day started off like, really early. I woke up at 8, burn disc, study, watch tv etc so and so. I shall not waste anymore space in this post for I wanna blog on more important things harhar. Anyway, went to Ampang around 1PM+, had a quick lunch after a fright given by most of the waiters and went to Kingdom office around 2PM+. Hyunnie and Kak Farah was like, trying to get the people in the mood? xD The time finally came homg, we saw some tall lads standing outside that heavy door. I swear, the moment they walked in, there was a moment of silence. Like,

...

Somewhat like when they bowed and started waving hi, the screams came. Everything started. XD Boy, even without make up the three of them were REALLY hot. And there was this certain aura that surrounded them. Star aura perhaps? Or is it because of my biasness towards koreans. Heh. But either way, some Q&A went on and it was so cute. I particularly remembered and love one was when,

simone; Do you have any role models?
them [EVE]; O_o?
simone; Like favourites...
SeungJu [Bassist]; ahh...
all of us; *nods nods*
SeHeon [Lead Vocalist]; I love U2.
SeungJu; I love *points to SeVin* U, *points to SeHeon then to the fans* too?

He's so cute right? SO FARKING CUTE ISNT IT? AHHAHAHAHA! He's really friendly and really really really nice. Okay, I sound like some crazy fan but seriously. They were SO close. As the Q&A went on, SeVin oppa didn't look too happy already. XD He's like I want to go. I want to go. I want to go. Let's go? Okay? Let's go! He started talking and thanking and the usual stuff stars talk about and was ABOUT to leave [because all of them stood up already], Kak Erenah asked them whether will they give their autograph and SeHeon oppa was like, oh? Okay. Sure.

And WHOOOOM. The whole room of gals went up to them. I'm like O_O! Do you even knowww themmm. Gawd. You don't even know their names for goodness sake. Okay, but it's okay. They are stars afterall. It's normal for any normal human [gal for this case] to run after them. So yeah, the line became farking long and being the forgetful me, I forgot to bring anything for them to sign. Amazingly MOST of of the kingdomers brought their books and markers O_O Boy, I'm one slow person.

But either way, when I stalked over to Simone, the moment she saw me she was like,

Omg, SeVin is so hot. I'm so gonna hug him.

Which made me went O___O! She too did not bring her book but she brought marker for Yvonne sshi? Lmao, you are so cute XD So the both of us stood there and commented away, saying how and what if they suddenly cut the line since they were so beria-ria nak pergi kan? Mana tau, the line became shorter and Simone went to line up after taking the book from Yvonne and I was like, probably I should just go line up and get a handshake each. I already got their siggies anyway, I mean, I'm going to get it anyway, personally customized somemore XD It has my name too. But ShuLing was like, you want or not? Just use my book la. So yes, I was behind Simone with the bookie.

I watched her request to hug SeHeon oppa and he was so cute xD He didn't dare to touch her skin. His wrist was on her waist but his hands were like *don't dare touch don't dare touch* HAHA! I didn't dare to hug SeHeon oppa, mehhh. He's seems pretty scary to me ;x But he's nice XD I'm not kidding hahaha, it's just me being dumb. And I swear, when Simone hugged SeHeon oppa, I could hear people behind whining ;x

Moving onto SeVin oppa [the hottest ;x] HAHA! I hugged SeVin oppa x] Seriously, thanks to Simone if not I also wouldn't hug. Haha. Really can feel his hug. Both his palms were like on my waist lmao. Okay, I sound perverted and this sounds wrong but heh, this is all for the sake of remembrance. According to the profile we referred later on, apparently SeVin oppa is 17_something? But I had to tiptoe so much O_O He's nice to hug HAHA! Those shoulder blades <33

Then SeungJu oppa! The nicest of them all. Wahaha xD I knew they were rushing for them. But like what ShuLing said, with the final few they were really nice. Towards the end, they were all chatty and ahahhaa. This fella, spell my name wrong. But in a really funny way XD

me; M.I.C.H.E
[he went alphabet by alphabet xD until...]
me; NOOO! *stares at the AL behind the miche -_____-*
seungju; But I thought Michele was like thisss...
me; noooo, this is michael! *points at the paper* E.L.E
seungju; ah.. *crosses AL & adds LE*
me; ah, yes yes. Correct.
seungju; *smiles; beams at me* *proceeds to write thanx! [and a] sorry!*

Damn farking cute la he. Then right, I didn't bother already. SeHeon oppa never hug only shake hand right. SeVin oppa is shake hand first then ask permission to hug and then hug. SeungJu oppa is sign already straightaway hug THEN only shake hand LOL. As told by Kak Bailah, his expression was like O_O to x]

LOLOLOL! So cute right? It's like ommo! this gal hug me! withoutmypermissionsomemore but I like! HAHA! Okay, this is abit siao already but yah, I believe, there was NO one else except Simone & me who hugged them Hwahwahwa! Meh, I'm proud. Thank you Simone XD Thank you Yuri for bringing them! <3 Oh oh and SeungJu oppa also even mentioned that Msian gals here are very pretty LOL [in courtesy to ShuLing's telling HAHA]

After all the commotion over and lotsa pics taken, they left with the happy SeVin oppa XD The crowd left and that few of us were left, shioknyaaa... We spazzed a great deal la, talked and laughed a hell lot. But it was fun! Really! Kak Bailah received this SMS [iforgotfromwho] that mentioned EVE was saying that the little 'fanmeet' was fun XD and they mentioned all the shaking hands. Got hug somemore! [HAHAHA! Weee!]

Later on went to The Curve to buka puasa with Kak Bailah, Rfa hyunnie and Nov. Shiok man seriously. We shopped a while in the flea market after dinner. Somewhat like around 2130, we proceeded home.

Boy, what a day~

Thank you Lord for bringing more and more korean stars to Malaysia. And allowing me/us to have such close contact with them. Praise Lord! <3

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Friday, October 20, 2006written once at 8:22 PM

Mind you, this is probably gonna be a long post XD So yeah, it started off with going to 1U in the morning around 11AM. We [Jordan+Melwin+Me] were so lost okay. We thought we missed the bus and because the weather was so hot; we took a cab down to 1U. Met quite alot of people we know there. LOL. Initial plans was to watch movie. And apart from our main star Melwin, our special guest was Beatrice [not beet-rai-si. Pronounced as bee-treesis] XD You get what I mean ahhahaha. But one thing, we spent quality time with friends apart from celebrating Melwin's birthday.

Happy 16th birthday pal! <3

The brothers gang came so late O_O By then, our three random guests were finishing up the last two slices of the pizza [we had shakeys XD]. Oh I forgot to mention, our three random guest; Admund, Boon Yen and Vincent. Yah so, this Benjo, go say he look like korean. Harhar! The moment Benjo took my cam, they started camwhoring. So in the cam now, there's like duplicated pics of them. _ _" Pics below. Haha, enjoy! Looks like it wouldn't be a long post today! *is happy*

I've really enjoyed today somehow. And these days I seem to be picking up and learning alot of new lessons XD But I think, the main thing is also to be happy and be grateful/appreciative of whatever that is happening or been done for you. I don't know why am I so contented lately but I like this change in mind rather than the stressed mode. Maklumlah, ketibaan SPM hanya tinggal beberapa minggu sahaja...

But it's all good. I feel that I've been spending quality time with family & friends lately. I like this change ;] It's making my life alot easier to go through haha. I've been very philosophical too right? Hahaha! Okay okay, I better stop here. The post is getting longer XD

On another note, IOD I's finale chappies were posted in Solid yesterday. Boy, I am so in love with Pris & Hamham's replies so far XD Thank you dearies! <3 My little dongsaengies! IOD II will be posted up later tonight heh heh.

PICTURES TIME! XD

Our three random guest ;]


Brothers gang yo <3


Brothers gang + Bday boy XD


Brothers camwhoring X 6


Brothers camwhoring X 3


Bday boy + Special Guest! ;]]]


Bday boy + Benjo + Special guest + Meee


Benjo + Lik Xiang + Me


Melwin + Beatrice ;] <333


Melwin + Hai Yuen <333


All packed in the car to go homeee~


Hahahahahaha! Have a great bday melwinny <3 If you guys wanna request any pics, feel free to drop me a comment I send on msn XD Mwah! Oh before I end, lemme share with you one of the lame jokes Beatrice dearie told us XD [I tell you, there's SO many, but I just can't recall _ _"] [Answer will be revealed in the next post XD]

1. Why kind of air bluff people?
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written once at 12:08 AM

생일축하해!

Anyway, today was an okay day despite the terribly wonky voice. Dear Lord, I really want back my usual speaking voice, probably a change in singing voice? Haha. Since this sickness is always a transition to another change in my voice. Anyway, recorded two birthday surprises for SL along with a graphic. I hope she likes it x]

I've learned a few things today. Probably only two, but learning and understand it now will definately help me in the future. It probably might help you too ;] So yeah...

First off, think positive for everything in life. I know we all have heard this phrase at least once since the day we understood English or whatever language or dialect. I've really learned it today. How I learned this lesson today is because of how my parents were so ... wanting to go out for dinner today. [Mind you, we've been going out for the past 2-3 days throughout the weekdays] I mean, this isn't really a problem for most people but for me, it is. I RARELY go out during the weekdays. I dislike going out at night especially during the weekdays. I wouldn't mind for the weekends, in fact I'll actually enjoy it more. And what's worse is that I'm sick. And I've got this chance to enjoy all these good food. [food at home sucks ;x it's either too salty or nothing suit me or like 3-4 days of overnight food] Okay, so yeah, today is Thursday and I got really sick of going out. The reasons for the past few days was to celebrate the belated/chinese bdays of my mom and me. And apparently, it's my chinese bday today. So we are going out.

At first, I really really despised the idea. I even wanted to just, tell my dad in the face that he should go with my mom alone. Probably even adding a line of 'Let you two have you er ren shi jie maaa' to make things look better. But I didn't have the heart. I was so used to life without my parents till at night. I was so used to being alone. I used to hate being alone. But as time went by, I started learning how to adapt to it and make full use of it. So yeah, as I waited for the time to come to go out, I went to shower and I thought about it. I'll probably regret in the future that I did not went for dinner with my parents. I mean, how rare is that we'll be able to afford going out to eat almost everyday for dinner? I should really be grateful. I should really appreciate. And I did.

And I'm happy that I made that decision.

I'm happy that I didn't make a face or pulled a long face to show displeasure. In fact, the three of us really enjoyed the dinner. I came back in time to 'celebrate' SL's bday and this is where the second lesson comes in.

I spent almost 2 hours to do the graphic. I skipped lunch time and study time to do it. I referred back to my old graphics to get back the effect I wanted. Probably I was too influenced with Hyuk's character in Pentagonic [my fic] that I'm expecting too highly of myself and wanting people's praises. When I sent the graphic to her, she didn't give me the reaction I wanted. Probably I'm just selfish and want / demand that I want to be praised. Sighs, I missed those days where my graphics were so demanded and sought for. Now its like, oh? okay. It hurts, seriously it does.

I seem to be crushed so easily. I'm like exposing my soft side too easily. I'm afraid. T_T I'm so scared people will take advantage of this point to bully me. Okay, so bully is such a kiddy word for now but I fear. I worry although this isn't exactly the right time to. SPM is coming in less than 40 days. I fear so many other things. I am scared of this and that. So insecure. And now this. I need to stop being so selfish and self-centered. Okay, so selfish and self-centered is the same but, sighs. I have yet to learn anything from this second lesson. But I do know that I need to change my attitude. I need to see the brighter side. Or else I'll have to live with sadness most of the time. I wouldn't wanna live a life filled with sadness!

I should really stick to XH's statement x] [she said this in class one day]

I got a C. You've got an A. Your job is harder than mine. At least I can improve. But you can't. You must maintain.

For this case, I have a weird graphic. Just when I thought art was subjective, apparently she agrees its weird too. I know life isn't all about impressing people. But for me, life is making people happy. And I want to make people happy with my graphics. I want them to LIKE my graphic. Okay, I'm being selfish again. But with a weird graphic... I'll take it as this is a C. I'll improve.

I will improve.

Apart from that, I think I'll make my confession here ;]

I love you mommy. I love you papa. Thank you for everything you have done for me. Even if you can't read whatever I am typing here, it's okay.

I love you Dongdong. Thanks for always being there for me <33 You don't know what difference you have made in my life. You've filled up some holes that were never able to close before.

I love you all especially moomoon, kak farah, rfa hyunnie, kak bailah, shulingie, simonie, yvonnie. Thanks for always loving me [maybe it doesnt apply for some of you? XD]and commenting in my bloggie!

Most of all, I love you Lord! Praise Lord! <3
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Tuesday, October 17, 2006written once at 4:19 PM

Okay, so the sore throat is finally gone but now the cough has worsened X_X I'm like, fearing whether I might cough my brains out somehow. Anyway, this morning was horrible. I suddenly had a nose bleed and when I thought it was all over, WHAM, I sneezed. As though sneezing is such a big problem you might think. It was never for me until today ._. Out popped this BIG blob of blood clot. Not to mention all the really icky mucus and leftover blood. Eee. It's horrible. It was horrible. I could smell and taste blood in my throat for the next few hours. It felt like as though I had blood for breakfast. I had to drink water like every 3-5 minutes to wash away the bloody smell. Boy, what a way to start the morning.

Anyway, I think I better do the tag from Simonie XD

List seven songs you are into right now
No matter what the genre, whether they have words or even if they're not any good,
But they must be songs you're really enjoying now
Post these instructions in your Live Journal/blog along with your seven songs
Then tag seven other people to see what they're listening to.

My seven favourite songs
1. God Will Make A Way
2. Eddie - 4th track [Iforgotthetitle XD]
3. DongBang - O. Jung. Ban. Hap.
4. Luther Vandross - Dance With My Father
5. Boyz II Men - A Song For Mama
6. DongBang - Phantom
6. LUG - Sarangui Urda

I need to stop coughing oh gosh. Anyway, my cyworld is finally done and up! Thank you Mei! <333 I heart Mei ^^ Drop by if you have time,

http://cyworld.com/meesiao

Take care and God bless everyone! <3
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Sunday, October 15, 2006written once at 6:46 PM

The reason why WTF is the entry title for today is because of many reasons. One for instance is what happened to YunHo T_T Those antis should really get a life. I mean, arghh. How could they pretend they are one of the coordis and give him that DRINK?! Poor boy, from the news it's reported that he vommited blood and aish. It hurts to know that. He's in the hospital right now. Updated news are quoted saying that his condition is stable already. Which is a good thing. Sighs... What's happening to the people these days? O_o?

Secondly, I'm having some stupid throat inflammation. I mean, it was SO sudden. I was all fine yesterday and today, all until somehow, something entered my system. I assuming its some air-borne virus, because this is too sudden. From a terrible case of running nose, after a nap with the flu tablet taken, I'm having throat inflammation now. It hurts like hell and I dont even wanna swallow my saliva. At first it felt like I drank water through my nose or something. Everybody please take care, the hazy condition now really is very horrible and terrible. You wouldn't wanna get into the same situation as me x_X The moment you feel like there's something stuck in your breathing system from the nose to your throat, immediately take precaution. Drink lots of water and take plenty of vitamin C. Dong you is one lucky person x_x Sighs... It's only the first day and I'm complaining. I can't sing! Wargh.

Thirdly, well. It's on relationships. I really don't know what is wrong with you. You always want something you can never get. When you get something you don't seem to want it and don't even bother. Seriously. WTF is your problem. I really feel like slapping you. Period.

Oh, on a happier note, it's DongHae oppa birthday today! Happy birthday DongHae oppa! DongHae oppa yah, enjoy your bday with your lover MooMoon today kk. Hwahwahwha!

I think actually I have alot of things to say but I just can't seem to remember. Must be the blockage of my breathing system to my brain -_-" Anyway... OH & Simoniee, I'm adding you to my affliates as Mrs.Rain okay? Mwah! And Yvonne sshi! where is your college? XD Yes yes Dong, I wanna bully you x_x OH. I remembered the tag at Simonie's blog, damn. I've got to go. But I'll do it later tonight. See you guys! <3

Before I end,

YunHo 오빠,힘내세요 <3
동해오빠, 생일축하해!
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Saturday, October 14, 2006written once at 3:29 PM

So yeah, I took this from Xiah's 100Q&A. I answered it and tadaa.

1.) Name: Michele Ng
2.) DOB: September 28, 1989
3.) Nicknames: mish. mishy. michbong. michhy. mwish. mishilicious. mishywashy. mishiewashie. etc @_@
4.) Bad habits: I hiccupp when I'm nervous x_x
5.) Religion: Christian
6.) Fav. Quote: SMILE!
7.) Bloodtype: dont know O_O
8.) Height/Weight/Shoe Size: 161cm/1g/1mm
9.) Family: Dad, Mom, Grandma, Aunt, Me.
10.) School: SMK Taman SEA
11.) Hobbies: Singing, listening to music, making graphics, chatting, writing fanfiction, etc.
12.) Specialties: Singing, writing fanfic.
13.) Sleeping Habits: Must cover blanket before dozing off.
14.) Something good about myself: My brain. & letting Dong bully. x_x
15.) What I think of myself: Crazy.
16.) Fav. number: 9
17.) Fav. Season: Autumn
18.) Fav. Food: Hmm... I don't know?
19.) Least Fav. Food: Bittergourd.
20.) Fav. Singers/Celebs: Shinhwa, Suju, DongBang etc
21.) Fav. Sport: None? ;x
22.) Fav. Flower: None? ;x
23.) Fav. Colors: White, blue, orange, brown, red, black, etc...
24.) Thing I do to pass time: Go online... Spazz. Tease Shu.
25.) Places I go most often (excluding home): School, shuling's house.
26.) Most confident thing I can cook: Egg.
27.) Songs I like these days: Dongbang - O.Jung.Ban.Hab
28.) What do you prefer: coffee, milk, soda: I don't like them
all ;x [quoted from xiah XD] but from the list, milk.
29.) Most important being in my life: Mom!
30.) Person I like least: Bimil. Heh Heh.
31.) Kinds of people I detest: In one word: Betrayers.
32.) Something I'm worried about : Exam ;_;
33.) What I think I was in my past life: a MALE.
34.) If I could be reborn: An angel lalalaa~
35.) When I want to get married: When THE one pops up.
36.) What I do when I'm mad: Go & bully ShuLing. Let Dong bully.
37.) Places I want to fix on my face: Nose, Teeth. Blargh.
38.) My dream/goal: Singer, Novelist, Someone with a high post. Mwahahha!
39.) Dream Salary: 100000000000000000000000000000000000 DOLLAR.
40.) My least liked feature: My ass.
41.) Something that happens everyday: Spazzing of suju ; hyukjae oppa & ryeowook oppa. Heh heh.
42.) I like/love someone right now: Yes.
43.) Jinxes: None.
44.) Something I could go back and do: Sing more.
45.) What I most regret in my life: Can't remember.
47.) Prized Posession: My computer.
48.) What I want to say to people full of themselves with
Prince/Princess Syndrome: Keep up the good work!
49.) My ideal mate: I love you, you love me~ Tall. Can sing. Treat me good. Love family. Respect elders. etc
50.) -
51.)What do you think of ladies who try and find seats when there are
none in Subways or Buses: Huh?
52.) Do you ever want to beat a small kid: If they are noisy and climbing all over my sofas. X_X
53.) What kind of kids scare you: bad kids.
54.) If you were to dye your hair, what color would you die it:
I won't dye my hair. I will highlight it.
55.) Most memorable Movie: Chinese movies that makes me cry.
56.) Most memorable day during MS: No MS for mehhh!
57.) If you were to be in a drama what kind of character would you
want to play: Someone powerful! A VAMPIRE! MWAHAHAH! Or probably someone that can bully Dong. HWAHWAH!
58.) When do you most not like your friend: When when uh, depends on my mood -_-"
59.) What do you think of guys who wear makeup: it's okay as long as they don't wear a lot.
60.) Makeup vs. No makeup on women: No makeup.
61.) favortie book (comics can be included): Dark Lover.
62.) What can you make with green onions and eggs: Omelette!
63.) Country I want to visit most: KOREA! My first love and bf are all there.
64.) If I could get any domestic animal: Fish. I want to name it HyukJae.
65.) Favorite song to sing at karaoke: Songs that I can sing
66.) Things I stress over most: My voice.
67.) Someone I want to meet the most in the world: Shinhwa's Lee Minwoo.
68.) What would you do if you found 1000 dollars in the street: I'll give it to my parents to spend.
69.) Something different about it being 2001: Uh, my last year in primary life?
70.) Do you believe in ghosts: Yeah, no wait, no I don't.
71.) -
72.) Do you think there's a time in your life when you can be happy anywhere and anytime: YES!
73.) Do you sleep over at people's house a lot: Not really. Not at all x]
74.) Something I need right now: Lee HyukJae.
76.) What game am I best at: None, I play no games.
77.) What would you say to someone who's about to die: I'll miss you.
78.) When did you ever feel like cursing yourself?: When I did something wrong and I know I shouldn't.
79.) What do you do when you can't fall asleep: Hallucinate.
80.) What would you do if you were walking and you farted when it was all quiet: Huh? Who who? Who farted?!
82.) Good/bad thing about our country: Peaceful ;x
83.) Foreign language I want to learn: Korean.
84.) My complex: Iishdontunderstand?
85.) What is there you want to do: I wanna have a studio recorded album, a book published, my graphics publicized.
86.) Do you find anything wrong with your face or personailty: Too crazy.
87.) What I do when I'm stressed: Watch vides of Minwoo oppa or HyukJae oppa. Complain to everybody.
88.) Have you ever wanted to commit suicide: Thoughts wise, yes. Actions wise, CRAZY KYAH?!
89.) What kind of teacher do you hate: Speak monotonously. [AMTeacher;x]
90.) Who's a person who gave you the most hope etc: Mommy <333
91.) What would you do if someone grabbed your things and started running: Throw something at that person and start screaming in all different languages and dialects I know of.
92.) What would you do if you saw a pervert on the street: Uh... run away?!
93.) What I think of losers/outcasts: -_-"
94.) -
95.) Are you willing to live your life to the fullest: Of course!
96.) Rain, Snow, Sunshine, Cloudy, Windy which do you prefer: All!
97.) Have you ever been attracted to someone you've chatted to online: I think so?
98.) What you want to say to your friends: I love you all! Yes YOU. who are reading this.
99.) Future plans: Audition. Get into a big recording company. BE SUCCESSFUL. And of course, have affairs. HEH HEH.
100.) You've finished! How do you feel: Finally!
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Saturday, October 07, 2006written once at 11:41 PM

I WAS supposed to have loads of pictures to post up. I went on a one day trip to Perak for a relative's wedding and yeah, I saw lotsa paddy fields, beautiful sceneries and of course, my favourite animals ; COWS! Or actually, it's supposed to be the rabbit because hyuk and I look like one ;x Heh heh. When I have resized the picture moomoon posted in 10B, I'll post them together WAHAHA. Okay, back to the topic. During the trip, I took funny and weird photos ;x

First was out meal. Our dinner XD My dad didn't like the idea of vegetarian so we went for dinner on our own excluding grandmama and aunty XD I took snapshots of whatever we ate. And then on the way back, I found the moon so fascinating O_O So I keep snapping. I keep snapping. And snapping~ Woot! Because my papa was driving so ganas-ly and speeding so crazily, the bouncing car made the camera go up and down making the moon looks like it is alive, jumping around happily. So yeah, the after effect rocks ;] Pics shall be posted later wahahha.

Ironically, all the way, I was sms-ing with MooMoon. Interesting isn't it? Taking pictures of the moon while sms-ing a moomoon.

Anyway...
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Thursday, October 05, 2006written once at 8:34 PM

This morning was quite easy to focus. But the haziness has yet to go away and it's annoying me. The smell is just... ugh. Was sms-ing with shu and the both of us were hallucinating/imagining things. I decided to not debut under SM but YG and later on date hyuk but have affairs with the boys from YG. Lala! But I'll definately need to finish my piano before auditioning. YG requires you to have a huge chunk of talent in you before you can go anywhere else. Blank thoughts I assume... Lately I'm starting to speak nonsensical stuff and crap un-understandable stuff. Just... skip the parts you don't understand. I doubt anyone is reading this except randomly the bouncing bear or guests? Or maybe *gasps* stalker?!

Who cares...

So yeah, I spent almost twenty minutes and the grace of the Lord to solve this add maths question. Harhar. But seriously, if it wasn't for the Lord to lend a helping hand in this, I don't think I would ever solve this by myself. Haha, I'm trying to do at least a few add maths questions every single day. I really wanna get a nice grade for SPM. Sighs, my results are no where near my dream. Probably I should push myself more? I seem to lose focus easily lately. I don't know whether it's just laziness or no fear. But I do fear. I am scared. I don't wanna do something now that I'll regret later. But my brains just don't seem to cooperate; especially the subjects with digits. I won't say figures because money is figures and digits.

Another thing is, my voice is getting weird. I mean, I can hit most of the high notes the female singers sing but it doesn't seem to be enough for me? In case you didn't know, I'm aiming to sing like Lim Jeong Hee <33 She's my hero ahahaha. I think even before I train my vocals, I should practise my pronounciation first bwahah. One thing I'm really happy and thankful for is that my mom actually supports me to sing. One of her parent [theirkidsinherkindergarten] is actually a singer and she trains the contestants of 8TV Project Superstar for their performances. And my mom told her about me and she is excited to teach me. But all plans for me to go for vocal training lessons will be postponed to next year because I'm going to Australia under the youth exchange programme.

To think about it, I'm now quite reluctant to go Australia. There's so many things coming up. There's so many interesting and fun stuff that's gonna happen! And I don't know when is it going to happen. Selfishly said, I don't want it to happen when I'm away. I should probably stop sighing and leave everything in God's hands. I've learned to trust him more these days. This year and the past year seems to be a turning point of my life. One of those fork roads once again. I've learnt and decided to leave everything in God's hands. There was this song that was taught by Pn. Julie during one of the CF meetings years back and I really like it. I don't quite remember the lyrics but the tune is still playing significantly in my head.

I cast all my cares upon you...
I lay down all burden down at your feet.

Lord, I'm so going to do that.

Oh and this little thingie Kak Farah made up for me ;]

farah - MISH = Mishy Is Solely Hyukjae's

Yap yap. I whole-heartedly agree with that. ;]
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Tuesday, October 03, 2006written once at 1:22 PM

Dong ah, you gimme a bear and I shall name it Dong okay? ;] I'm anticipating that okee? Heh. DongBang's 3rd album was just released and they had become my drug. X_X I need their dosage like, at least 3 times a day. I was just adding the files to my playlist while I do my work and I decided to add Unforgettable [2nd Album;4th Track]. I like this song alot and because of my minimal korean understanding, I decided to look up for the meaning and wow, I didn't know it was THAT touching. No, I'm not being sarcastic. But read for yourself;

04. Fool (Unforgettable)
translation by: Jungie (also credit: aheeyah.com)

A lie, it's all a lie, those words that time will make me forget you are a lie.
The pain from the seperation has surpressed my heart a little but my feelings for
you are ever the same.

I never thought it'd be easy but
even though a lot of time passes
It's still awkward without you here.

I still love you and I still want you.
I won't ever be okay without you.
Even if I seem attached, this is me, I didn't even know.
You're all I long for.

A lie, that was a like, those words that I've already forgotten you are a lie.
I just said those words because I thought I'd look pathetic and because of my
trifiling pride. I've never once forgotten you.

When I think about a bad habit I've started
I try and forget but
I still will miss you

I still love you and I still want you.
I won't ever be okay without you.
Even if I seem attached, this is me, I didn't even know.
You're all I long for.

I've never stopped loving you. My feelings for you have never changed.
No my heart keeps growing like my love for you.
I just try and keep still the moments when we were happily together.

You had a hard time in my embrace
and it's not until after I've let you go can I think and see clearly.
But I love you everyday
I'm still waiting for you like I've always done
See you once again, my love

See you again, my love...

Apart from that, I'm currently facing this dilemma. I don't know to solve it nor understand this problem. I'm worried and scared but telling it wouldn't help much either. Most people won't understand. And probably won't even care. So I decided to leave everything in God's hands. He's going to be my manager and settle everything for me. I know you will be there for me Lord...
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